Author Mike Ellis brings you GUY CODE SLANGUAGE, MTV2's ultimate, guy's guide to the laws of manhood. Every bro knows the code from man-scaping to man-crushes, wing men and sexting.

Here are some fun snippets from the show.

Bros Before Hoes

    This should go without saying.

Ass Beating

    What you'll get from your boys if you violate the guy code

Horny Little Bastards

    What all men are

Girl Code

    Not a part of the male mantra


    When can 2 men share an umbrella or sit on another man's lap

Wherever you tell her

    This is where you're going to eat, not where she wants

One Nike Swoosh

    The number of logos you can publicly display unless you're an athlete with a professional endorsement

Rock, Paper, Scissors

    Any dispute lasting longer than 3 minutes shall be settled this way.

Chinese Slanguage. So easy a chick or a prisoner can do it.

Click on any of the images below to purchase Chinese Slanguage at


Body Parts

Comparison chart of popular, foreign language programs
Program Cost Refund Method Feedback from
RosettaStone $499 & up No

Immersion in
your living room

Helpful to terrible

Pimsleur Up to $1,299 Within
30 days
Immersion in your living room Helpful to boring
Berlitz Up to $250 Can be
Grammar Loved it to disappointing
Penn State
Italian 101
~$1800 No Classroom You'll learn one word for $1,800: Chow
Penn State information provided by Daily Collegian Editor, Lynn Ondrusek. She can be reached at 814-865-1828 or
Slanguage Books are $10, site is free Yes

Replace foreign words w/English

First book to proudly produce Americanized French & Spanish

Buy at Amazon. Click above or below pictures